Personal · Think Pieces

Fog of the Future

Every now and then I make an attempt to restart this blog properly and almost every time I barely get beyond two post without forgetting to update it.

Will this time be different? Probably not but let’s be optimistic. On to the main point:

I’m currently in state of wait. That is all my actions in regards to my future and what I do with myself are on hold until I receive a certain letter. I’ve made applications for a Master’s degree and the reply should be coming my way any day now. One hopes anyway. Once I have that, whatever the decision, I can start making arrangements for myself. For now, however, I am frozen in a state of inaction. Well not complete inaction but no action concerning anything more than three months from now. At present I can only see as far as the end of August. After that it’s disturbingly dark, and I don’t mind admitting I’m rather nervous. I like planning my life out in advance to an extent. Not every little thing I do but I’m always more comfortable if I have a clear outline to operate within. For the first time in several years, I don’t have that, and I’m worrying…rather a lot.

Even if I get accepted onto my course, there’s always the matter of funding to consider. There’s a grant I can apply for but since it’s awarded at random, the chances are I won’t get it which’ll leave me squeezing pennies even harder than I’ve had to in my prior university career.  The deadline for the grant applications comes in July too, so I hope to Zeus I’ve heard on the accepted/rejected front by then. Then there’s the kerfuffle of figuring out where to live…post-graduate fretting is the worst kind of fretting. …Okay well, yeah it’s not. There are many worse kinds of fretting, but for a suburban, white, middle-class boy who’s not had huge tragedies in his life thus far, it’s pretty bad.

Well wish me luck, my luvvers, and let’s hope I’ll have a post for this blog again soon.

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